Cursed
by NaturallyCapricorn
Summary: A girl made a promise to someone she once loved and may still do have feelings for him. Although, the promise she has made cursed her into solitude. Whoever she becomes close to is bound to disappear... or so she thought. Rated T for language and stuff. Gam/Fem!KK
1. Chapter 1

It's been four fucking years since I've seen John. I'm kind of worried but at the same time I'm not. He's pretty strong for a skinny, lanky guy, but that doesn't mean I can't worry. I still remember the last thing he said to me before he left. _"Karkat, would you wait for me?"_ I stupidly said yes. Now, I'm cursed. Whoever I become close to, is bound to disappear mysteriously after three days I've met them. I didn't believe it at first but it started happening a week after John left and people who were close to me no longer stay with me. They either moved or transfer out of my school or some other scenario. No one ever really stays for long. Ever since that day, I've became a dick to everyone to save them from my curse.

"Really? Is that what she said?" A student from my math class shouts. She's very dramatic, like who cares what 'she' said. Get on with your fucking life. People address her as Mindfang because she can claw into your mind and manipulate you. Well, at least, that's what I heard.

As I was about to get up, Sollux, the computer genius comes over and hands me a folded paper. I stare at it for a second and then I looked at his face. The 3D glasses aren't fucking helping. He nods his head as if trying to tell me to take the paper. So I did.

Walking out the school building and into the girl's dorm, I finally opened the paper and it read: _Hey, Karkat, would you like to go to Alternia Arcades with me? Don't worry, we won't be alone. My friends are coming too, so you don't have to listen to me talk about my computer nonsense. It'd be great if you came. We meet at 4:00pm. -Sollux_

Fumbling to get the key into the keyhole, I finally opened the door to my room. Slamming the door shut, I jumped onto my bed and hugged my crab stuffed animal. Dad got it for me when I was eight. I miss him.

"I should get some coffee." I said, but then burst out laughing because I don't drink coffee! I don't even like it! Getting up from my bed, I changed into a new set of clothes. As I was about to leave, I grabbed the little piece of paper that Sollux gave me. Maybe I'll change my mind about not going.

Entering the coffee shop, I saw someone…different. He wasn't the usually guy who worked at the counter. To be honest, he looked attractive.

"Hey, sis, what can I get you?" The guy says in a low, lazy but oddly sexy voice.

"I want a hot chocolate with lots of whipped cream… and a cherry on top." I said, mumbling the last part.

The guy nodded and went to work. I checked my phone and it read 3:30 pm. Great, only thirty minutes 'til the date. A smile grew on my lips. I willed my lips to form a frown because smiling isn't my forte. I look like a creepy fan girl who just layed her eyes on some smut fanfic.

The guy came with the cup in his hand and placed it on the counter. I couldn't take my eyes off him. He was saying something but I wasn't paying attention to the words, just his eyes. They were brilliant purple.

"Sis? Uh… sis?" The guy called out.

"Yes, thank you." I took the cup into my hands, embarrassed that I was distracted by him.

"We didn't have cherries, so how 'bout a kiss?" The guy says, rubbing the back on his head.

"A... a kiss?" I stuttered, almost dropping my drink.

"Yeah," he took out from under the counter a huge chocolate kisses. Where in the hell did he get that?

"Oh," I burst out laughing to the point that everyone in the cafe is staring at us. "Thank you." I took the kisses from his palm.

"You have a beautiful laugh." He says, slowly as if he's trying to remember it.

A blush grew on my cheeks as a smile formed on my lips. "Thanks. Oh, right." I say, reaching into my pocket from my wallet.

"It's on the house." The counter guy said, quickly, stopping me from taking my wallet out.

"Really?" I gawked at him in disbelief.

He nodded with a genuine smile.

I bit my bottom lip as my smile grew bigger. "Thanks." I say as I took my leave. That was probably the first time I've gotten something for free. This was the best day so far.

I kicked a pebble as I walked to Alternia Arcades. It was pretty far though. I haven't walked a long distance in a while, I didn't have anyone to walk with. What's still on my mind is that guy from the cafe. His voice was what set me off, I'll tell you that. I didn't even look at his name tag on his shirt, goddammit! I'm a fucking idiot! Now, how am I supposed to know who the fuck he is? Maybe I'll go to the cafe tomorrow and find out. AAAaaahhg! What if he's not there tomorrow? Well he has to be, I mean, he fucking works there. It might just be a part time thing, though.

"Ugh! Don't know what to do." I say, aloud.

"What don't you know what to do?" Someone says.

I jumped. "Sollux, you scared me!" I turned around.

"Actually, I'm Gamzee. One of Sollux's friends."

"Oh.. Hi, Gamzee. I'm Karkat. Where's Sollux?" I asked.

"Don't motherfucking know." Gamzee says, looking around with his lazy eyes.

Taking a long look at his face and noticed there was make-up on it. It would be hard to notice considering his skin is pale was ever. "You have make-up on-"

"Karkat! Gamzee!" Someone called us from afar.

It was Sollux and two other guys.

"Sollux, you're slow as fuck." I say, kinda harshly.

"Sorry, KK. These two got lost and I had to come get them. Karkat, this is Dave." Sollux pointed to the blonde one. "And this one is-"

"Jake! I'm Jake!" The black haired one with glasses says in his British accent.

"No, you're not. His name is-"

"That's my middle name. My first name is Jake!"

"Fine, whatever. This is Jake."

"I can see that." I say in an amused voice.

We all go into the arcade and something was weird about this place.


	2. Chapter 2

This wasn't an arcade anymore. It's a fucking club. I've lived in Skaia for twenty-two friggin' years and I wasn't notified that Alternia Arcades turned into a shit club. I didn't sign up for this crap!

"I'm leaving." I say as I headed for the exit.

A hand stops me from reaching the door. Turning to see who it is, the black haired guy lets go and blushes like an awkward child. "Don't go. Hey, you'll never know, it might be fun!" The black-haired guy says. I forgot his name, if you're wondering. I'm not good at remembering things.

"Yeah! Who knows? You might meet a motherfucker here." Gamzee said, making a point.

"Ahem!" Sollux catches our attention, forgetting that he invited me to come here.

"Fine. I'll just be in the corner if that's okay with you guys." I told, gravitating away from the crowd.

"No, no. Karkat, stay. Socialize for a bit. I promise _nothing_ will happen." Jake tried convincing me. Maybe he's right. Maybe nothing will happen.

"Okay." I assured.

There was a bar in the middle of the club, I'll go chill there. There were groups of older people dancing in a cluster fuck. It was uncomfortable. Why was I here in the first place? Right, a certain guy with 3D glasses asked me to go with him, which by the way, isn't a good way to ask a girl on a date if you're gonna flirt with other bitches. Way to spend a Friday, fuckass.

It's been two goddamn hours, when am I gonna go home? I tried getting out of here, but Jake keeps insisting I should stay and he keeps emphasizing certain words. Maybe it's just his British accent.

There was a blonde guy that came with Sollux. I wonder where he is. I think he left. Maybe he wasn't the party type of guy.

Where's Gamzee anyways? Oh, there he is. Sitting next to me with his head resting on his arms on the table, he's possibly asleep. It was probably from all the shots he took earlier. Jake is next to me, too. He keeps looking at me and telling me to go talk to someone, besides him.

"Why don't you want to make friends?" He asks.

The question wasn't as easy to answer as it seems. Sigh. I wanted to tell him but at the same time I don't. He wouldn't believe me anyways.

"I don't want to. Having friends, suck." I say, coldly, holding back tears I kept for so long from all the loneliness.

"Well, I don't disagree with you. But sometimes having friends isn't so bad." Jake leaned back in his seat.

"Easy for you to say," I sipped the liquor in the cup in front of me.

I could feel his eyes on me. I could feel the pity in his eyes. Getting up from my seat, I was about to walk away until Jake grabbed my hand. I turned back to look at him and his eyes were glowing blue… just like John's.

"John..." I whispered.

"It's been a while, Kat." It was John.

My hands made a fist and I punched him straight in the face, pretty sure a tooth fell out.

"Karkat, wait-"

My arms wrapped around John's neck and my body relaxed against his. I could feel his arms wrap around my waist. I could feel his warmth again. I could feel _him_ again. We didn't let go, I didn't think I ever could neither does he. John kissed my forehead.

"I'm here, I'm here." John whispers.

I took a good long look at his face. It wasn't Jake's face, it was John's. Seconds later our lips met. I melted into the kiss... literally, if that was even possible. Once the kiss broke, John wasn't there anymore. Instead, he was with that blonde guy walking away from me. The blonde guy turned back to look at me. I could see his eyes from the backs of his glasses. Red. He has red eyes. A smirk played on his lips... and that was the last thing I saw before everything grew dark.


	3. Chapter 3

Dark. Everything is fucking dark. But it feels relaxing. My eyes sting, though and my body is aching. Wait, am I asleep? Oh, my god! Am I dead? If I am, I could totally say dick tits. DILDO MILK! Yup. Benefits of being dead.

"Karkat." A faint voice called out.

"Shut up." I say, loudly that my voice echoes.

"Karkat! Karkat, wake up." The voice grew louder.

"Karkat." It called out repeatedly. It was getting louder and louder and louder!

"Shut up, shut up, shut up!" I screamed as my eyes opened and I sat up quickly. My head spun a little.

I saw Gamzee sitting on a coffee table in front of me holding a cup of water and a little bottle of what I think is medicine. Cautiously, I looked around and spotted Sollux on the other couch.

"Don't worry, he's fine. Just motherfucking asleep," Gamzee says. "Here, take this. I'm not sure what it is but I heard its motherfucking ecstasy."

"What?" I questioned.

"It's painkillers. It'll make your headache feel better."

I felt a splitting in my head and I took my hand to my forehead. "Uugh..." I groaned in pain.

"Here, Kar." Gamzee says to me as he handed me the cup of water. I snatched the cup and drank the water. "What about the painkiller?"

I shot a glare at him. "What about it?"

He gave me a sympathetic look that I just couldn't really resist for some reason. Taking the bottle in my hand and popping two pills in my mouth and swallowed. Why does it have to be bitter?

My legs wobbled when I got up. I ain't staying here. I have places to be, like my dorm.

"Where are you going, sis?" Gamzee asked.

"Back to my dorm." I replied.

"You can't just all up and leave. You're still hungover." He tries to convince me but that's not gonna stop me.

"_You're _still hung fucking over. I'm leaving." I walked over to his door and as I was about to grab the door knob a pair of arms wrapped around my stomach. I didn't have to turn to see who it was. "Let go."

"You can't motherfucking go yet." Gamzee said it in a way that was... sad. He _really_ didn't want me to fucking leave. God, he's stubborn.

"I have to get back to my dorm."

He lets go of me and I turn to face the guy. His eyes are brilliant purple.

"The girls dorm is across campus, you gonna up and walk all that way to get back to your dorm when you're still motherfucking hungover?" He asked me.

"The fuck am I supposed to do? Stay here? We have classes today! Oh, my fucking god! I'm gonna be so fucking late. I'm gonna get detention! WE'RE gonna have detention!" I panicked. I turned to open the door and Gamzee reached above me to shut the door.

"Sis, calm down. It's Saturday." He says, softly.

"It's... That's right. Yesterday was.. Friday." I say, slowly. Yesterday there was five of us. I looked behind Gamzee and Sollux was there but where was the other two?

"Are you okay?" Gamzee tilt his head.

"Uh... yeah." I paused. "There was five of us yesterday."

"Huh?"

"There was five of us." I repeated.

"Nah, sis, it was just me, Sollux and you." Gamzee told.

"Then who were those two guys that were with us?" I asked.

"There were no two other guys, Kar-sis. Just you, Sollux and me. I think I hit your head pretty hard when I took you up into my dorm."

I went over to one of the couch seats and sat down. There were two other guys with us. "One guy was named Jake and he brought a friend. I remember having a few drinks and... and..." My sentence faded once I start to remember what happened. That Jake guy wasn't who he said he was. He was John. John was there, then... then... he disappeared. That 'friend' took John.

Tears start to well up in my eyes. I buried my face in my hands as my heart ached all over again when John first left. I always knew I would see him again but... as an illusion? Maybe, I am becoming crazy.

Gamzee pulls me in his arms without a word. The gesture made me cry even more, wishing it were John who held me, not this stranger. Gamzee papped me and shushed along the sidelines.

"That's cheating Mituna... you're the fucking loser!" Sollux slurs behind us.

We turned around and Sollux was talking in his sleep and curses. I threw a pillow at Sollux and he woke up, confused. After Gamzee gave him water and some painkillers, Sollux left. So it's just Gamzee and I... alone. I really shouldn't be here. I can't be close to him. He's really kind and he probably has a girlfriend he cares about, I can't take that away from this fucker.

"I should go." I say.

"Wait, I have to ask you a motherfucking question?" Gamzee stops me.

"Yeah, sure."

"Do you remember what went down yesterday?" He looks at me seriously.

"Depends on what you want to know," I responded.

"Between us," he finishes.

There was something between us? No, it can't be. I don't remember that. Well, I was fucking drunk! I couldn't have remembered whatever he's talking about. "No? I don't remember. I was drunk. I'm sorry about whatever shit I did."

Gamzee just gazes at me for a long fucking time. It was uncomfortable until I realized he wasn't looking at me, but into space. I had the urge to slap him. The thought made me giggle a bit. I gazed at him back. His eyes caught my attention, they were purple and beautiful. I could feel my eyes softened when I thought about John and how our lips touched, it was like magic. Unconsciously, I closed my eyes hoping to bring back the feeling. John held me tightly in his arms as warmth grew between us. His sky blue eyes meet my redish brown eyes. Slowly, John leans into me and his lips pressed onto mine. I still remember that warm feeling.

Opening my eyes, Gamzee was really close to me, like really fucking close than normal then I realized that his mouth is locked with mine. I pushed him away roughly. "What the fuck?! You kissed me! Haven't anyone told you not to kiss strangers? God fucking dammit!" I wiped my lips vigorously.

"I'm motherfucking sorry! I thought you were hinting that you **do **remember what happened yesterday!" Gamzee exclaimed.

I processed what he was talking about, then it came to me. "WE KISSED?!" I yelled. "I remember kissing someone else, not you!"

"Well, I don't motherfucking know. I was laying back on a seat and you were next to me. Suddenly, you punched me, luckily not hard enough. Then you got real close then you kissed me. You didn't stop so I pushed you away. You started to get all emotional on me and then you took a snooze. Sollux was already out so I carried you both to my fucking crib." Gamzee explained to me.

"I kissed you?" I questioned.

"Yeah, but it's okay. Happens when you're drunk." He says, kinda sadly.

"I'm gonna go." I say in a hushed voice.

"Yeah, see you around, sis." He waves with a sad smile.

As I opened the door, I whispered a quick thank you and left. Even though he's just a stranger to me, I wanted to feel his lips on mine again.


	4. Chapter 4

Leaning against the cold shower wall and the hot, steamy water pouring on my skin, it burns… just like my lips. I kissed Gamzee but I thought about John or at least that's what I thought I did. I don't know. I'm just so confused. Was yesterday even real? Maybe Gamzee was right. Maybe I was just too drunk too realize that it was all not… real.

I closed the shower and my body immediately shivers in the cold room. I could feel the goose bumps growing on me. I glanced at my mirror image and I noticed how skinny I am. Right, I don't really eat as much as I used to ever since John left. Wrapping the towel around my small figure, my tears happened to slip down my cheeks. And then I sobbed. John breaks my heart but I still love him. I'm just a heartsick fool.

I sat on my desk chair and went on my computer. Someone pestered me. That's... strange.

terminallyCapricious started pestering carcinoGeneticist

TC: HeY mOtHeRfUcKeR

CG: WHO THE FUCK IS THIS

TC: i'M gAmZeE

TC: AnD wHaT dO pEoPlE cAlL yOu

CG: kARKAT

TC: wOaH i MeT a SiS nAmEd KaRkAt

CG: YEAH I'M THE SAME PERSON FUCKASS

TC: I kNeW tHaT

TC: aRe YoU fEeLiNg OkAy

CG: YEAH I'M TOTALLY FUCKING FINE

CG: MY HEAD HURTS A LITTLE BUT I'M OKAY

CG: WHAT ABOUT YOU

TC: i'M aLl MoThErFuCkInG sAd

For some unknown reason, I felt sad when Gamzee said that. I hope it wasn't something serious.

CG: WHAT'S WRONG

TC: I'm AlL mIsSiNg YoU

At this point I'm speechless and motionless. My cheeks are burning, dammit Gamzee!

TC: ArE YoU dOiNg AnYtHiNg

CG: NO ACTUALLY I JUST TOOK A SHOWER AND I'M WAITING FOR MY HAIR TO DRY

CG: THIS FUCKING SUCKS

CG: WHY DID I HAVE TO BE BORN WITH LONG HAIR

CG: IT GETS IN THE FUCKING WAY

TC: you should cut it if you motherfucking want to

CG: YOU CHANGED YOUR QUIRK

TC: yeah does it bother you

CG: NO THE EXACT OPPOSITE REALLY

TC: sO yOu LiKe It WhEn I dOn'T uSe My QuIrK

CG: I DIDN'T SAY THAT DIPSHIT

CG: IT BOTHERS ME LESS

CG: I COULD ACTUALLY UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU'RE SAYING

TC: YoU dO lIkE iT tHeN

CG: YOU'RE DOING THAT ON PURPOSE

TC: how about you

CG:WHAT ABOUT ME

TC: do you always type like that

CG: Yeah pretty much

CG: Does it bother you

TC: nah, it just makes me feel like you're yelling at me

CG: I'M SORRY

TC: could we video chat

TC: i wanna see your face especially when you blush

TC: it's so motherfucking precious

CG: you're being delusional

I switched to my webcam and a second later I see Gamzee staring back at me.

"Hey, sis." He says with a smile and a wave.

He's sitting on a chair and his hair was slightly wet. He wasn't wearing the make-up, I like it. I think he was in the shower. His bed was far behind him and there was a painting on the wall. It wasn't making an image, it was just a concoction of colors. The color that stood out most was candy red.

"Hey, fuckass." I said.

"Kiss." He says.

"What?" I blushed.

"There's chocolate kisses on behind you." I looked behind me and I saw the big kisses on my night stand. I don't remember putting it there but it's there. "You didn't eat it."

"I should put that in the fridge." I got up and put the little kisses in my mini-fridge next to my laptop on my desk.

"You actually thought I meant a real kiss, didn't you?" Gamzee rambles.

"Wha-?"

"When I said how about a kiss, you thought I was talking about a real motherfucking smooch." He says with a hint of a smile on his lips.

"That was you? At the cafe? You work there?"

"Yes, yes and motherfucking yes."

"Holy shit!" I exclaimed. Then my face grew all hot again.

"You okay, sis? You're turning all red."

I nodded.

For the whole day, Gamzee and I started to talk about things we like and things we disliked. He loves making pies and eating them. I thought it was kinda cute. I could imagine him in an apron and baking some delicious pies. I told him that I liked to watch rom-coms and I named all the rom-coms I've ever watched and liked. He said that I was like a fangirl of romantic comedies which is not fucking true. We talked and talked and talked. I knew where he lived... well, the number of his dorm and he knows mine. Just in case we wanted to hang out, we gave each other our phone numbers. We had nothing in common but for me, he was interesting.

* * *

I lie in bed awake. I checked my phone and it read 4:50 AM. Oh, my god! Ugh! This is bullshit! I can't fucking sleep!

Maybe if I closed my eyes, and so I did. This is kinda peaceful. It's almost like I can just sleep...

My eyes shot open and I look at the time. It's 5:00 AM. Was my window open because I could feel a cold breeze just come into my room. I turned to my side and I saw a figure. I sat up, curious to know who the fuck was in my room. The person turned and it's eyes glowed blue. Instant, I knew it was John.

"John." I spoke.

"Karkat." He whispered.

"Are you really John? Like, not a figment of my imagination. I've been seeing things lately so I'm not fucking sure if you're actually here." I say, but laughter broke from my lips when I realized that I might be talking to myself. I felt something wet on my face when I noticed that I was crying.

It hurt. He wasn't even real.

"I'm just fucking crazy." I say, aloud.

"We're all a little crazy." John spoke.

"Yeah, a little." I pouted.

"Karkat, I'm closer than you think." John says, close to a whisper.

His body started to become blurry then I realized that he's fading... or I was waking up.

"Wait," I reached out, "what do you mean?"

His mouth formed a smile, the one he always gave me to assure me that he's okay. This time it wasn't okay. _I wasn't okay_.

"John, wait!" I exclaimed, jumping out of my bed. Biting my bottom lip, I cried once again. I held my knees to my chest as the sadness drowns me into the abyss. I guess I'll never escape that place.

I laid on my bed for what seems like hours, I finally get up. I should visit Dad today. It's been forever.


	5. Chapter 5

The sun is high as ever and the grass is green and there are flowers everywhere. I should get Dad some flowers, he loves them. I stopped by the flower shop quickly to get some roses and other combinations of flowers. Dad always loved a variety of flowers. He's just weird like that. Does that make me weird too?

To be honest, the bus was crowded as fuck. I'm pretty sure someone farted because it stank, bad. The bus had stopped at my location and then I just got off. I looked around. I think I might be lost. The street sign read: Sermon St. so this is the right place. I knew I should've visited often, maybe I would remember the damn place I'm supposed to be at.

Far in the distance, there were two people. One guy was wearing a black leather jacket and the other guy was wearing a red sweater. They were holding hands but then I realized that it was Kankri and his boyfriend. Kankri must have seen me because he was waving and shouting "Karkat! Karkat!"

"Hey, Kankri." I waved back, sighing as I approached him.

"Hello, Karkat. Were you going to visit dad?" Kankri asks.

"Why else would I be here?" I say, rudely. God, I hope he doesn't give me lectures again.

"Now, Karkat, that was rather triggering. I appreciate it if you—"

"I'm lost, can you help me?" I say, quickly, shutting him up.

He dropped the lectures and led me to our father.

Once we got there, I set the flowers on the ground next to Dad's gravestone. "Here Lies Mr. Vantas, Father of Two".

Kankri came to see Dad because he wanted to tell dad that he's engaged with Cronus, his boyfriend. They are perfect together, despite Cronus being a douche sometimes and Kankri being a talkative asshole of triggers. Seriously, how does it work?

When Kankri decided to leave, I left with him. Staying at a cemetery alone gives me chills of a goddamn lifetime.

"So, Karkat. You have someone in your life? Or are you still... searching?" Kankri asks as Cronus drives the car.

"You don't need to fucking know... but I do have someone in mind." I deepened my frown so I won't smile, but it's not the working.

"I'll let your triggering language pass. However, if I hear you swear again you'll be in big trouble." Kankri lectures.

"Yes, mom." I say sarcastically.

Cronus snickered and Kankri glared at him. I giggled a little. It was fun making Kankri irritated. While in the car ride, I thought about Gamzee. I wonder what he's up to. Maybe he's painting because he always says that's how he like to express his emotions. Every color stands for what he's feeling... I wonder what he's feeling right now.

It's been like... maybe two days? I'm not sure. And surprisingly, Gamzee hasn't gone anywhere. I mean, like disappeared unexpectedly. One thing I know for sure is that my curse isn't gonna be gone until I find John... or if he finds me. He probably won't though, considering the fact that I mostly screwed things up between us. And being the ignorant asshole he is, he won't remember shit. Or even me for the matter.

Kankri offered to stay for dinner but I declined and told him to take me to the bus station. I didn't want to go back to my dorm yet. There's a shit ton of things I want to do before I could suffer another goddamn memory flash. I really can't be alone.

Waving to Kankri good bye before he drove off and once the car was out of sight I ran the other direction. There was a boardwalk that had lots of people and food. OOooooohhh! FOOD! I need to be there! Running as fast as I could through the crowd of people and children that I felt like I was flying. Didn't know I was this fucking fast! I ran through people, jumped fences, and tripped a few times to get to this boardwalk. It's all for the food.

Like you'd expect there were lots and lots of people and kids. They were all laughing and holding ice cream and everything just looked so happy... almost like a dream. I wiped the sweat off my forehead and went to go sit at that bench near the group of trees. My knees felt weak anyways, so why not chill.

The sky was bright as ever, it almost blinds me. I don't know when but I'm pretty sure I fell asleep. God, I hope no one comes and takes me. That would be really bad.


	6. Chapter 6

There was something cold on my head and a really cold breeze. The one thing that stood out the most was a sweet, sweet sound, a strumming of a guitar and a little hum. Little by little, the humming turned into words.

"_There is a time when we all fail,_

_Some people take it pretty well,_

_Some take it all out on themselves,_

_Some they just take it out on friends,_

_Oh everybody plays the game,_

_And if you don't you're called insane,"_

I recognize this song… and the voice as well. Gamzee said he liked to sing. I didn't think he'd be this good.

At this point, I was half awake, just didn't want to open my eyes. All I wanted was to hear his voice and how it soothing it is. All I wanted was him.

Once the song ended, I sat up and stared at Gamzee. He stares back at me with a slightly shocked face.

"Sorry, it wasn't that g-"

"That was beautiful." I interrupted him.

"Thanks, motherfucker," he says enthusiastically as a smile grew on his lips.

"Where are we?" I asked looking around, noticing we're outside under a tree… like in those animes that John used to talk about.

"I found you getting' your nap on so I thought maybe I'd bring you to some place quiet. Y'know, to sleep without the loud sounds." He explains as he was about to tuck his guitar into his guitar case.

"Oh… You could've just brought me home. I mean, you know where I fucking live asshole. Jeez, does that brain of yours work?" I got up, dusting the dirt off my pants. Gamzee got up too. The height difference bothers me so much. How the hell is anyone that fucking tall?

"Honk."

"Ugh! Shut up! Your obnoxious honking irritates me to the farthest planet in the entire galaxy."

"Honk."

"Stop."

"Honk."

"Gamzee, no."

Before he could open his mouth to say another honk, I smacked my lips onto his, shutting up the clown. Breaking our kiss, my face grew hot. I'm pretty sure I look like a tomato. Ha ha…

"Honk." Gamzee says just above a whisper, but still in his deep voice. The dude's got some deep vocal cords. Even though I wasn't looking at him I knew he was smiling.

We went to the boardwalk where there wasn't as much people as last time but I didn't care, this place still had food... which reminds me that I hadn't done much when I got here. There was an ice cream place over to the north so I ran there. Gamzee chased behind me, probably thinking that I was trying to get away from him. Ha! No, fucker! I just want my motherfucking ice cream!

Opening the door with the jingle bells on it, I almost tried over my feet. I looked up and saw a guy with a funky mohawk wearing a pink apron and holding a tray.

"Uh, are you okay, Miss?" He asked, looking concern.

"Yeah, just fucking peachy." I responded just as Gamzee walked in through the door.

"Tavros, my bro!" He exclaims, going in for a hug with the guy, Tavros.

I felt a glare burning on me. When I looked to see who was looking at me, I saw the girl from my class, Vriska. What's she doing in a place so... bright? Didn't know she was the type to be in an ice cream store. I wonder if there's another reason she's here because she doesn't look like she would be ordering ice cream and the laptop she has was probably keeping her company.

"Karkat, this is my best bro, Tavros. Tavros, my best sis, Karkat." Gamzee says as he introduced us.

I noticed Vriska packing her stuff and exiting the shop. What's her deal? Eh, it might be something else. I shrugged it off.

Tavros offered to get us anything and, of course, I wanted a combination of all the ice cream flavors as a banana split boat and with a cherry on top. Tavros got me my order while I was talking to Gamzee about how fucked up the economy is. Gamzee offered to pay for the large amounts of ice cream. I'm sorry, I'm a sucker for sweets. After that we left the shop, Gamzee said his good byes and I thanked Tavros for the ice cream.

* * *

Gamzee and I did all the things that I wanted to do. We rode the ferris wheel, went to a terrible bar, played in an arcade and wasted most of our money. There were little trucks with foreign food in it and it was amazing! This was kinda like a date. A date... with Gamzee. I turned to look at Gamz and he was staring back at me. I swiftly turned my head as my face grew hot.

"We should go back to the dorms." Gamzee suggested as he trotted away towards the dorms direction.

"Yeah, it's getting pretty late." Gazing up to the night sky, the moon shone bright into my tired eyes.

Gamzee and I split ways, he's going to his room while I went to mine. Unlocking the door, I leaned against it. Letting out a big sigh, the tears felt like they'd spill any minute until a breeze from the window shook the pale gray curtain. Wait, the window wasn't opened. Confused, I moved closer to the window and shut it. Now there is no way the wind could open my window. Shrugging it off, I hopped onto my bed. Hanging out with Gamzee was fun! I hope we could do it again some time. that is, if there's another next time.


	7. Chapter 7

The sky looks pretty, I thought while I paid no attention to the teacher giving the same old boring lectures about… I don't even care. When I tilted my head down I noticed someone familiar. It's that guy with the shades, what was his name? What is he doing anyways?

"Spade, I need to pee." I say, during one of Slick's lectures about god knows what.

"What do you want me to do about it?" He grunts.

"Hand me the pass, please?" He took the pass and tossed to me. I whispered a quick "thanks" and left the room. I headed out the building to search for that guy with the shades. I saw him once in a dream. Maybe he has the answers to where John is.

The whole front of the school is empty.

"I don't get it." I say, aloud.

He was right here… somewhere? Going near one of the trees and sat under it. I checked my phone but there were no messages from Gamzee. It's been three days since he hasn't contacted me and I'm getting really worried. What if I never see him again? I've been going to the coffee shop more than I should and Gamzee's co-workers haven't seen him lately either. I buried my head in my knees. He's probably gone for good. It's all my fault.

"Karkat?" Someone called.

"Leave me alone." I muffled from my knees.

"Don't you wanna see John again?" My head shot up, staring at the shades that covered his eyes.

"You… You know where he is." I got up and took him by the collar. "Where is he?"

"You're a feisty one, aren't you?" He smirked.

"I'll wipe that smirk off your punk ass face if you don't tell me where John is." I gripped his collar harder and grind my teeth.

"If you let go I can tell you why he hasn't been here." I hesitated because I didn't trust him but I eventually release him. "Good. He doesn't want to see you."

Once he said those words, my heart felt like it dropped to my stomach making me want to vomit. I didn't believe it, but why do I feel like it's true. If John didn't want to see me then why do I keep seeing him everywhere I go? Am I just seeing things that aren't there?...Have I finally gone crazy?

Instead of confronting him, I turned back to the building. I don't plan on crying over John. He's never been there, he's probably not the same person anymore. The curse is probably just an unfortunate case of events that doesn't have anything to do with me anyways. You win. Whatever god is trying to torture me or try to teach me a lesson, you win.

"What?" He stares at me blankly. "That's not how it goes, you're supposed to want to convince yourself that what I said is wrong. You're supposed to fight for him. Do you even care?"

For some reason, something inside me snapped and I couldn't control my pent up emotions. "DO I CARE? YOU JUST TOLD ME HE DOESN'T WANT TO SEE ME AND NOW YOU ASK ME IF I CARE? How insensitive are you? I give up! I haven't seen John four fucking years and in those four years I've been suffering from isolation from everyone I've ever loved... I just give up. I'm tired, so fucking tired."

The shades guy doesn't make twitch a muscle on his poker face, all he handed me was a phone and then he was gone.

* * *

When school was over I went into my dorm and crashed out on my bed. It was an exhausting day. I had to decorate for a masquerade party that's happening two weeks from now and I'm not up for that. Well, if I don't know who the person is then maybe they won't disappear. Speaking of disappearing, Gamzee hasn't called or texted me in forever. I hope he's not gone, I can't help but feel like he's already gone from the start... like he wasn't real in the beginning.

I stare up at the ceiling for some time now until my eyes start to close my eyes from my fatigue.

It's 5 o'clock and my bed is covered in roses? I heard a knock at the door and cautiously go to open it. A girl with short blonde hair holding a single flower picked from the ground. Is she my date? Or someone I'm supposed to go to a fancy place with? Because her dress is really classy with all the right touches and glitter and ruffles. She walks down the corridor and I followed her.

We were at the gym where there were pretty little lights decorated on the netted walls with roses attached to them. There were a lot of people there but all I could only focus is on her. The people were there but I feel like I'm alone with her. Suddenly, she took me into a tight grasp and held my body close. We tangoed, it was funny, my body was moving on its own like a puppet... someone's puppet. I looked at the girl dancing with me but she was no longer there. It was John...in a dress. Before I could say something, I woke up.

At first I was all confused then I realized that I got a text. I checked it and it was Gamzee.

From Gamzee:

SoRrY fOr NoT kEePiNg In CoNtAcT i WaS aLl BuSy AnD sHiT

From Me:

IT'S ALRIGHT.

From Gamzee:

i WaNnA mAkE uP fOr It

From Gamzee:

cOmE tO tHe CaFe

I blushed at the thought of us being alone together. Then another thought occurred to me, Gamzee is still here. Did the curse wore off? That's impossible because John needs to be here. I've been seeing John everywhere so maybe that could be it. They were all illusions though... I'm just crazy. I shook it off and got ready to see Gamzee despite the fact that it's 4 in the morning. I wonder why he texted me so early in the morning. He really must have missed me that much.


End file.
